How to Keep Your Sex Life Healthy in Marriage

How to Keep Your Sex Life Healthy in Marriage Relationships Spouses & Partners Print How to Keep Your Sex Life Healthy in Marriage By Sheri Stritof Sheri Stritof has written about marriage and relationships for 20 years. Shes the co-author of The Everything Great Marriage Book. Learn about our editorial policy Sheri Stritof Medically reviewed by Medically reviewed by Carly Snyder, MD on January 25, 2020 facebook twitter linkedin Carly Snyder, MD is a reproductive and perinatal psychiatrist who combines traditional psychiatry with integrative medicine-based treatments.   Learn about our Medical Review Board Carly Snyder, MD on January 25, 2020 More in Relationships Spouses & Partners Marital Problems LGBTQ Violence and Abuse Sex does not have to get boring in a long-term marriage. As the years go by and you get older, your intimate relationship should get better. Sex with your partner can become more satisfying because you know each others likes, dislikes, habits, and preferences.   We know that life can get in the way. Chores, kids, finances, and other issues can put a damper on romance. These everyday factors can interfere with both your desire for sex and finding the time to put in the effort. But dont put sex last on the to-do list. There are ways to prioritize sex and keep it exciting. What You Need for a Healthy Sex Life?? Building and maintaining a good sex life with your partner requires both of you to put in time and effort. These are the ingredients that can help you keep your intimate relationship satisfying: Productive and meaningful communication??Love for each otherPhysical attractionWillingness to make time for each otherDate nights, fun, and playfulnessAcceptance of each others flaws and quirks There is no reason why you cant have an active and healthy sex life for many, many years. Try the strategies listed below to keep these key ingredients in your marriage. Verywell / Emily Roberts Keep Your Sex Life Healthy and Strong There are different ways to keep things fun and exciting in the bedroom. Try any of these techniques to keep sex with your spouse satisfying for both of you. Good Communication Communication is the key to a healthy and active sex life in a marital relationship, so talk with one another more! Chatting about superficial things can be fun, but remember to go deeper in order to really establish intimacy. Share your innermost thoughts and feelings with one another regularly. Sexual intimacy is a continuing process of discovery.?? True intimacy through communication is one of the things that can make sex great. Share Desires and Expectations Talk openly and share your sexual desires. Be open and honest about what you want. You dont want to use this time to be critical of your partner. Just assert what you want in the bedroom and what makes you feel good.   Talk with one another about your expectations concerning lovemaking. False or unmet expectations can hurt your marriage. If your expectations are not being met by your partner, communicate this tactfully and sensitively.   Sex in a long-lasting relationship can deepen and become a richer experience. No matter how many times you have made love to each other, the wonder and awe of mutual attraction can still be there. Make a Plan When life becomes busy and schedules are hectic, plan for sexual encounters with one another. Some people may find scheduling undesirable, but it all depends on how you look at it. You can make plans just as exciting as spontaneous sex.  Flirting throughout the day or specifying a sex date can build anticipation. Try to set the mood in advance.  If you want to have good sex at night, start the foreplay in the morning. Let your partner know you care and are thinking about them throughout the day with notes, e-mails, texts, phone calls, hugs, or other flirtatious gestures. Initiate More Often Dont expect your spouse to be the only one in your marriage who is responsible for romance. You both need to take responsibility for having an intimate and successful relationship. Hold hands  and show affection often. Women particularly need to feel loved and connected in order to  have the desire for sex.  Make time for  date nights  and other novel activities together and be open to trying new things! More Tips for Your Married Sex Life?? Of course, even with careful planning and genuine effort, you might run into occasions when sex with your spouse doesnt meet your expectations. Keep these tips in mind. Being grouchy or ignoring your spouse during the day hurts your chances of having a positive lovemaking experience that evening.Remember that sex is not going to be perfect each time; dont compare your sex life to the portrayals you see in movies or on television.Recognize that abstinence now and then can be beneficial to your relationship. You may find that it builds anticipation and start to lust after one another more. Its about quality before quantity.Take good care of yourself.?? A healthy sex life intersects with your overall physical, emotional, and mental health. Ways to Spice Up Sex in Your Marriage